By: Ariel Munyer
Melvin Martinson was a man of few words with a big heart. He met his wife, Mayme, while he worked as a lumberjack. A child of the Great Depression, he straightened nails to reuse them and left the protective coverings in his cars as long as possible. He enjoyed fishing in the many lakes near St. Paul and watching professional wrestling (which he never seemed to realize was choreographed). He was a reliable example for his grandchildren. Though not religious, Melvin finished the attic of his home to ensure his grandson had a place to live after serving a religious mission.
Melvin Martinson died in 1975, and I was born several decades later. So how could I possibly know all these details about a man I had never met? I learned them by interviewing his grandson, who is my grandfather. These details rarely appear in documents like birth certificates or censuses—they exist in people’s memories. You should capture these genealogy gems before those memories, and people, are gone.
So how can you turn your next conversation with a grandparent or other relative into a family history interview? It just takes some simple preparation.
Identify and schedule
Identify family members you want to interview. I recommend starting with your oldest living relatives; their memories will get you the furthest back in time and you want to preserve them while they can still share. Reach out to them and schedule a time for a phone, video, or in-person interview. Be warned that some relatives will tell you they have nothing important to share, but encourage them to share anyways! They may think their lives unremarkable, but you will benefit from their rich stories that will bring new life to your family history.
Scheduling a time rather than conducting a spontaneous interview gives your relative time to collect their thoughts about themselves and/or their ancestors about whom you’ll interview. A planned interview may also prompt them to pull out family photos and heirlooms you’ve never seen before! When you schedule the interview, make sure to ask if you can record the video and/or audio of the interview; respect the interviewee’s wishes on this topic. Now that you’ve scheduled a time, you need to prepare as well.
Prepare a list of questions
Make a list of questions you want your family member to answer. Ask yourself, what do I want to know? Will the topic be the individual themself or family members they knew that are now deceased? Craft questions that will prompt them to share stories rather than simply saying yes or no. For example, instead of asking, “Were you married to Grandpa in 1970?” ask, “What do you remember about your wedding?” It’s acceptable to ask factual questions if you are trying to establish facts, but always follow up with an open-ended question. Sometimes these interviews will touch on sensitive memories such as the loss of a loved one, divorce, a difficult childhood, etc. If such things come up, give your relative the space to choose what they want to share. Do not force them to avoid or disclose painful stories. You can find a list of sample questions at the bottom of this post.
Prepare props
Ask yourself if you have any items you want to bring to the interview. Photos, heirlooms, and similar items can prompt your interviewee’s memory. Do you want to know the story behind an afghan passed down in your family or an old photo? Bring the item with you and pair it with a question. I’ve always found that sitting down with a stack of photos gets memories flowing fast! Even when my immediate family goes through old photos, it prompts memories we haven’t talked about in years, and we have fun reminiscing together.
Record
Don’t forget to record your interview with video and/or audio. Taking an audio recording on a device such as your phone can be the most simple and least intrusive choice. Assure the interviewee to help them feel more at ease; you’re just having a conversation and you don’t want to miss important details about their experiences. Taking a video recording can make some people feel nervous but will preserve all the non-verbal aspects of the interview. Carefully consider with your interviewee what works best. Recording the interview is a valuable strategy because it ensures a record of the entire interview and removes the stress of trying to capture the stories in notes. If your relative is uncomfortable recording the interview, you should come prepared to take notes on paper or from your laptop. Your relative has invited you into their memories, and you should respect how they wish to preserve them.
Enjoy and thank
Make sure to enjoy the stories your family member shares; they will likely share things you’ve never heard before! My mom and I have interviewed my grandfather more than once and with each conversation we get new information. You may have heard some of the stories before, but this interview is your chance to preserve these stories for yourself and others. Thank your family members for taking the time to share their precious memories with you.
Preserve and share
Once you have made a recording or notes, make sure to preserve them. An easy way to do this is by uploading your recording or typed notes to the FamilySearch Memories. You can also share the recording or notes with other family members and perhaps listening to or reading the interview will prompt stories of their own!
Now that you know family history interviewing basics, I strongly encourage you to schedule an interview! These interview-style conversations will deepen your connections with relatives, living and dead. Plus these interviews are so enjoyable to conduct and review for years to come! Perhaps someday you will share memories with your descendants about the times you spent flipping through scrapbooks and laughing with family members they never knew. And what better way to honor our loved ones than to pass down their memories?
Sample Interview Questions
Did you go to college? What was it like?
Why did you choose your career?
What is something your parents taught you?
What was an admirable quality of your grandpa? Your grandma?
Tell me about the town in which you grew up.
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